The Essence of Us

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I'm going to a wedding soon and I find myself particularly excited about this one. I've been to weddings before but this one is different. Not like a theme wedding where everyone wears Star Wars or Star Trek outfits. No, this one will be my first and I hope not my last, same sex couple wedding. Squeeee!

This couple has been together for 15 years waiting for their state to provide the Equal Opportunity that everybody should have had from the beginning of this nation. I'm glad we've evolved as a nation and that I too see things differently than I did before. But this couple just makes you happy to be a couple too. They're a delight to be around and I'm over joyed and honored that we're invited. Their essence is a beautiful thing to experience. You know that they were just meant to be.

It led me to think back to Anita and my early days. Learning about each other and becoming us. We had many similarities and enough differences to keep us growing. Acting out of our damage as most of us often do, we found the pieces of the puzzle to become more than just healthy individually but developed a dynamic as a couple, an us that makes me flutter. This sparked a memory I'd not shared before and I'm surprised because I've loved to tell the sequences in our love story. 

We're currently preparing to receive lot's of family and friends for July 4th. An annual event at our place. It's the season for our home to be a bed and breakfast, so to speak. We entertain, we accommodate, we host friends overnight from near and far. We invite neighbors for cookouts. We enjoy all of it.

So I thought, what is our essence? And this memory came right to the forefront. Waving it's hand like a grade-schooler who knows the answer to the math on the flash card. Me, Me , Meee!!! 

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On our honeymoon, we took a flight from Oahu to the Big Island of Hawaii. We wanted to do a helicopter ride over the volcano and drive around the island and go up to the observatory. Many of the things I got to experience when I spent four years stationed in Hawaii. One day, with no specific agenda, we strolled around in the city of Hilo. After breakfast with wonderful views of the ocean and far off mountains, we walked around,  shopped a bit and took some photos in a seaside park. Soon after we happened upon a glowingly tanned Hawaiian woman, sitting on the sidewalk in a not too clean dress, who was playing an ukulele and singing a song with a joyous look on her face. There were no other street performers around and she didn't have a bucket or instrument case out for tips. She was just there, looking at folks and singing with a smile. She was radiating joy to say the least, I had to engage.

Her name was Grace and she was sometimes homeless and beyond the joy was someone who might have had some mental issues but chose hope over despair and joy over sadness. An older tall gentleman with a white beard happened upon us and Grace acknowledged Paul, having seen him around but not overly familiar. The conversation was candid and fun and it was lunch time, so Anita and I invited them to join us at a nearby restaurant.

We had an absolute ball. Breaking bread and learning about one another. We took some photos and exchanged personal info. I remember them.

It was a pleasurable experience and that, that is, the essence of us.

We like to share the experience, with others.